After a really busy week of tech conferences, we’re all still trying to figure out what’s going on in tech. Microsoft's Build conference dropped, then Google's I/O started a day later; both were lackluster. As Apple's WWDC nears, there's hand-wringing about Marzipan, the cross-platform app framework meant to (finally!) unite iOS and macOS. Also, Sea Bream is on the menu. Wait, what?

All right, enough chit-chat. Let’s talk tech. Here are the things you may have missed for the week of May 6.

Marzi-pain

Apple’s cross-platform app scheme, which we’re collectively calling 'Marzipan' because it still has no official name, is a popular idea. Most tech pros think it will work. And in theory, it doesn’t seem too hard to get iOS apps to work on Mac. Cool.

But the old guard wants to pump the brakes on Marzipan hype... and there’s good cause. A blog post from Iconfactory, makers of apps such as Twitterific and xScope, highlights the considerations around making iOS apps available for macOS. Keyboard and mouse/trackpad interactions are one thing, but it’s also possible that Mac users will want something more powerful from apps; windowed copycat iOS apps will definitely get some one-star reviews.

Build Flounders

Microsoft Build happened this week, and you probably didn’t really care. There is a new Terminal app, which is nice. Linux shell in Windows 10, too. Oh yeah, and some Azure-related updates. Okay.

Edge is now based on Chromium. The Fluid Framework will make workplace collaboration a total mess (trust us; dozens of people editing documents or code at once is going to get really messy, really fast).

There just wasn’t much to Build this year, and for most tech pros, that’s okay. Microsoft is doubling down on Azure stuff and creating a new space for itself in cloud computing. It doesn’t need to be exciting; and really, its announcements had one day to shine, because…

I/O Flops

I/O started the day after Build, and sniped all the attention. This happened last year, too, and we just don’t get why these companies don’t chat ahead of time to avoid scheduling conflicts like these.

The I/O keynote was light on anything developer-y, but the post-keynote news was interesting. Chromebooks are now Linux machines. Flutter is turning into Google’s favorite new toy, and Kotlin its favorite new language. In fact, it’s now prioritizing Kotlin over Java, which is just begging for a Drake meme. You know what, here’s one for you:

But what really happened at I/O? Google tried to convince us all its deep mining of data was actually a good thing by framing its knowledge of your entire life as a service. Nope. If you want a deeper dive on just how nefarious it all is, read this blog post from Stratechery. “Don’t Be Evil.” Sure.

Fish for Hire

Flounder? Flop? Fish? C’mon, you had to see that coming, right? No? Maybe you’ve had enough mimosas this morning. Time to switch to coffee.

A fake-fish LinkedIn account (a Sea Bream, if you're tracking how many animals have been offered tech jobs lately) actually received a pitch from a recruiter. Yeah, someone wanted to hire a fish.

Or maybe not. It could be fake, but a recruiter reaching out to a fish for a job in tech is believable. Recruiting really is a total joke sometimes.

Have a great weekend!